I Feel Guilty for Putting Myself First.

Have you ever found yourself saying yes when you really wanted to say no?

Perhaps you worry about disappointing people, letting someone down or being seen as selfish if you put your own needs first. You might spend so much time looking after everyone else that taking an hour for yourself feels uncomfortable, even when you're exhausted.

If that sounds familiar, you're not alone.

Many people have learned, often from a young age, that being kind means putting other people first. Over time, it can become difficult to recognise where other people's needs end and your own begin.

The problem is that constantly putting yourself at the bottom of the list comes at a cost.

You may find yourself feeling drained, resentful or overwhelmed without understanding why. You might feel as though you're running on empty while still believing you should be doing more.

Looking after yourself isn't selfish.

In fact, taking care of your own emotional wellbeing often makes it easier to care for the people who matter to you. When you have the time and space to understand your own thoughts and feelings, you're more able to make choices that are healthy and sustainable for everyone involved.

Person-centred counselling isn't about encouraging you to stop caring about other people. It's about helping you understand that your needs matter too. Together, we can explore where that guilt comes from and whether it's still serving you.

Many people discover that learning to value themselves doesn't make them less caring. It simply helps them care for others without losing themselves in the process.

You deserve the same kindness, compassion and understanding that you so readily offer everyone else.

At Pebbleshed Therapy, I offer online person-centred counselling for adults across the UK. If you feel guilty for putting yourself first, you're welcome to book a free 20-minute initial consultation. It's a relaxed opportunity to ask questions, find out how I work and see whether we'd like to work together, with no obligation to book further sessions.